The Fightback Starts Here!

1. Baroness Scotland stays in the headlines. Her erstwhile cleaner goes public to state that she never showed the worth Patrician her passport, which in any case was outdated. The police have yet to find any evidence of forged documents. The day after the Baroness is exposed for claiming £170,000 second home expenses the government changes the rules so that she is not breaking any code. The public are reassured that the rules that apply to the rest of us don't apply to anyone in government.
2. Gordon Brown contrives to look desperate and pathetic in his repeated attempts to get a photo-opportunity with Barack Obama. Meanwhile Tony Blair is charging £180 a head in Toronto to anyone wishing to be photographed with him.
3. The government pursues its obsession with turning every adult into a potential paedophile. This time two police women who have been offering mutual support to each other in the form of baby sitting have been told that they are breaking the law.
4. Andrew Marr asks a coded question about taking painkillers in an interview with Gordon Brown. Brown doesn't answer the question. The Downing Street spin machine goes ballistic and stokes the story. The Guardian blames Guido.
5. Lord High Everything Else hints that he would not be averse to working with a Conservative government.
6. Tessa Jowell is asked a question about Labour's vision for the future. She doesn't know. She waffles.
7. Alastair Darling makes a speech about the economy. He is questioned about Baroness Scotland only paying her cleaner a miserable £6 an hour.
8. Kevin McGuire says the Labour Government looks shifty on the economy.
9. Get the bankers. Never mind that nothing has been done about bonuses in the time the government has been running nationalized banks. Let's do something popular for the conference.
10. Charles Clarke makes a few helpful suggestions.